Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Dear So and So

Normally I do my Dear So and So's on post it notes but this week they are a little long so here you go:

Dear Lame Person who made fake free Doritos coupons:
Seriously?! Wow!  I'm not sure what's worse, poor folks falling for it and printing it up and taking it to the store and being told they can't use it and leaving empty handed and stomach growling OR store clerks not giving a rat's butt and giving away free bags of chips with no valid coupon code to enter it with.  But the latter has me thinking that if there are business owners and workers out there who just don't care enough to check authenticity then I may just have to print out my own coupons like these I'm working on:

Free Rent This Month
Buy one pair of shoes get 5 more expensive ones free
5 Extra Days Off with Pay each year. 
Ok, I'm ready to cash in, hoping I run into some not so caring people to use these on!
Love,
Humored but Shocked

Dear Very Annoying I think I'm better than you attitude Lady across from my booth:
While I do enjoy chit chatting and making new friends with the vendors next to my booth I really don't appreciate you arguing every statement or comment I make and going the extra mile to prove your point.  Here are just a few examples: I say I can't wait to get Monkey potty trained, you say, "NO you don't want to do that, keep her in diapers as long as possible, well that is only if you use cloth diapers because you shouldn't be using disposable ones anyways I work full time and still used cloth diapering so you can't tell me it's for SAHM only". I say we'll be transitioning Monkey into a toddler bed around age 2 you say "Oh No you don't want to do that, she'll just get up and not stay in bed." I say I love Monkey's daycare school, you say "How can you love a daycare, they are awful, either need a private preschool or be a SAHM." I say it's so nice to be out of the office for a few days and you say "Well anytime I'm out of the office I get called non stop because it's my business and they can't do a thing without me."  I say I plan on homeschooling, you say "But you can't be president of PTA like I am and run things." I say this is a pretty cool show and you say "It's ok, it was much better when I owned it, the girl bought it from me a few years ago and it's just gone downhill from there, they just can't do it like I can."  Seriously I've never wanted to punch someone in the face as much as I wanted to punch you.  But I did receive great joy each time shoppers walked past your booth and straight to mine to make a purchase, so pppppphhhhhhh (that's me sticking my tongue out and blowing like the mature and civilized mom that I am!)
Love
A mom who has nothing to prove to you

Dear new next door neighbors:
I can't tell you how excited I am to have neighbors who blare their music loudly outside at 9:30 pm right by Monkey's window while she's trying to sleep!  I am trying to be understanding and it stays lighter outside later and it's Texas so the weather is perfect right now but not sure how long I can tolerate Monkey waking up and crying holding her ears.  I can tell this is the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
Love
Rolling eyes neighbor

Dear Poppa:
I just love the new golf net you set up that takes up a fourth of our yard, it's AWESOME!!!
Love
Rolling eyes Wifey

Dear Diet:
Once again you can suck it, why is it I go 3 weeks with no sugar or sweets and go through the cravings and headaches and withdrawls and finally get you out of my system only to cave and have a few bites of cheesecake for our anniversary and it's like I never left you, so much so that the next morning all I can think of is donuts?  Thanks a lot, so here I sit going through the cravings and headaches and withdrawls all over again, for a measily few bites of cheesecake?  Yes it was worth it. :)
Love,
Hating you and hating Julian Micahels still,
Me!

So what are you're Dear So and So's?  If you have some share them, or link up with Dear So and So at Three Bedroom Bungalow.
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